Mr. Perfect

In case you are not a wrestling fan, there used to be a wrestler dubbed "Mr. Perfect".  His name was actually Curt Hennig.  

Curt was an amazingly talented individual.  He was revered by his peers and fans alike.  His gimmick (or story) was that no matter what he did, we could do it to perfection.  He could bowl strikes, hit a hole in one, and beat every wrestler.  

Ironically, he was an extremely flawed individual.  He died 15 years ago at the age of 44 from cocaine, steroids, and pain killers.  His need to be perfect, to never lose, to not make a mistake was his undoing.

How many of us as caregivers, or even typical parents, hold ourselves to such lofty standards?  How many of us are actually killing ourselves in that quest to never let anyone down, or to be in every right place in every right time?

I remember once in Disney World where I wheeled Tyler up to the Pirates of the Caribbean ride, and asked for the handicap entrance for Tyler.  I was told there was no wait so if he could transfer into a boat (which he could), we would be able to walk right on without using a handicap entrance.  I decided to trust her, took him out of his chair, and walked him down the queue line.  To our dismay there was about a 10 minute wait ahead of us at the bottom. With an autistic child who HATES lines, this might as well be 10 hours.  I immediately panicked.  We tried to surround him and take his mind off of the fact that we had stopped moving.  This did not work one little bit and he figured out a way to give a kick to the man in front of us.  I quickly walked him back up the queue line, past anyone coming the other way, and right back to the safety of his chair.

I was FURIOUS.  Not at him, and not even at the ride attendant, but at myself.  I had put him, and the other fellow, in harms way by not doing my job.  I put him in a position that I should not have put him in.  The situation demanded I be Mr. Perfect and I made a mistake.

Trust me, I have an entire highlight reel of mistakes I can play in my own head of the times I wasn't perfect.  

News Flash!  We aren't perfect.  Say that again....we are not perfect.  

If you are like me in this way (and heaven help you if you are) we have to learn to somehow let ourselves off the hook.  We have to try and tell ourselves that we did the best we could with what we had in front of us at that very moment.  Somehow we have to learn to live with the times it didn't work out the way we thought it would.  We have to strive to always do what's right but recognize that are human just like everyone else.

Be well and God bless.    Tom